Saturday, April 23, 2011

Wild Woman Update


Well, kids, it's a beautiful, sunny day, actually warmer out than inside, and my door is open to the fresh air. I've been sitting on my porch swing watching the hummingbirds come back and back to the feeder, while Jasmine rolls around luxuriously on the porch rug. I have been Contemplating Change, of which life is so abundant.


This is my cute comfy living room, with the new laminate floors I waited years for, installed this past winter. The soft sage green walls were painted before Christmas too, a gift from my sister to me, as was the laminate - I just paid for the installation.


I love Tibetan prayer flags, and have them on my porch and, in good weather, out in the yard as well. Cant have too many prayers wafting up to the heavens!


My teensy table and the lovely daffodils of spring, gathered from the base of my big maple, now sporting buds right on schedule for another season of leaf-making.


Functional small kitchen at the other end of the living room. Tibetan photos on the cupboard door.


My favorite place in the world, my cozy purple bed, which I wish I could spend more time in!
I am SOOOOOO tired!


Other half of my purple bedroom.



The computer room, with more shelves of books. In my small place, I have six bookcases of books I cant part with, having divested myself of several hundred others, recently, in a quest to down-size.


Desk and computer, where The Magic happens :)
The Dalai Lama keeps me company, from the windowsill, and the side of my computer tower.


My front porch, next to bed, my favorite place, porch swing
for Pondering Weighty Matters out of sight to the right.
I will miss this porch the most, along with looking out
and seeing so much space around me.

My little place has never looked as cute as it has since the For Sale sign went up. This winter was a tough one, too many expenses, between renovations costing three times the estimate, Jasmine's surgery and expensive after-care,  then the hot water tank blowing and Pup's death one week later.

I was flummoxed. It was all too much. I need to offload debt, down-size and find a way to live more cheaply. Even my modest housing is difficult to hang onto, given the economy, prices going up every month, and disability income that hasnt changed since 1996.

Every time I have been in this position before, when I set things into action, the universe rushed to support me, and both times I was moved out within ten days. So we shall see. It feels like this is what I am meant to do. My left leg is giving out under me, I need to  take it easier and for that, life has to  be easier. We shall see if the universe supports this move, as it has before.

This place has been Home since 2003, the first home since I lost mine in Tofino when I first got ill. I will miss it. But when I feel like I am rowing across the ocean in a teacup, I have to do what needs doing to get to an easier place. If this place sells, I will move into a very tiny suite in my sister's house across the road. One big room, and a small kitchenette. I can do it. I will be able to keep the things that mean the most to me and get rid of the rest. Even though I purge every few months, there is still too much stuff, and so much of it can go, without ever being missed.

I am lucky to have that option, as renting anywhere else would be more expensive than keeping this place. On the other side of this big change, life will ease, and I need it to do that, and soon. My health is faltering over the struggle to hold on, and so the intelligent response is to just .... Let Go. Life has been a series of losses, but with every loss there is also a gain. I know this by now, and next winter has to be easier than this past one. I will do everything I can to make it be. The rest is up to the universe.

I just hope Pup will still find me when I move. Sometimes Jasmine gets so excited, snuffling along the fence with her tail wagging, that I think he must be in his yard. He'll get confused if he comes and someone else is here. But I wont be far away. I'll leave a trail of his favorite treats across the street, so he can be sure to find me.

5 comments:

  1. Sherry, I wanted to send you a smile via a simple story. As someone who has spent the majority of their life in the dairy industry I have the self appointed nickname, "Dairy Lama." So as I read about a photo of the Dalai Lama keeping you company at your desk I could not help but smile out loud. I have been known to have great insight but it pales in comparison. In all seriousness I do want to wish you well in your latest adventure. May the impact of your support for others come back to you ten-fold. My limited experience in this writing, sharing, blogging world has shown me quite quickly that the world although crazy and very scary at times, is just fine. As long as there are Sherry Blue Sky's, sharing their blue sky's, it's safe to go out and play. Simply, "Thanks."

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  2. Oh, Sherry, this is in some ways so sad. So sad that you will be moving from the place that was your home for the past years. It looks comfortable, cozy, neat, a place of refuge. Life isn't fair sometime. I hope it will be a good move for you, to be with your sister. And I do know that Pup WILL find you. Blessings!

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  3. Thank you so much for a glimpse into your private space, Sherry. I always feel so close to you, and this has opened up your world. I love all the prayer flags and the books of course!

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  4. I like seeing where you sit and type and your view! It is a lovely nest; I am sad for you, but know change is part of the process. I am glad it isn't far to move and it is family. You will still have the same blue sky, the closeness to your furry family's favorite places. I love prayer flags, I have one near my bed. Thanks for sharing; your view! xXx

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  5. Life is endless change, and change is sometimes the hardest thing on earth to assimilate. You are doing a wonderful job of facing up to it and moving forward and I admire and respect you deeply for it. It's ironic and a bit funny that our houses never look so good or have so many of the things we've always wanted as when we get ready to leave them--we do for the buyer what we never do for ourselves. Best wishes that all goes smoothly and gets easier soon.

    edit: my word verification is: guest rug. Weird, eh?

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I so appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
Thank you so much. I will be over to see you soon!