for the Thursday Think Tank prompt
at Poets United : Shadows
For fourteen years
you were my shadow,
along the sandy beaches
stretching to forever,
down every forest trail,
on walks
along the river,
or swimming
at the lake,
lying on the floor
beside me
as I tapped the keys,
watched a movie,
read my book,
went to sleep.
You followed me
from the
wilderness
we loved
to live in town.
You mourned
our loss of wildness
right along with me.
To be with me,
you gave up
everything you
loved.
You would have
followed me
anywhere,
even to
the gates
of hell.
That last night,
you didn't want to
get out of the car.
I had to drag you.
Obediently,
head down
with knowing,
you followed me
into the vet's.
You did not
follow me out.
That's the part
that just kills me.
Now I look
for your shadow
everywhere.
I keep waiting
to see your
ghost shadow,
still following me.
The guilt is the hardest part, and the most unnecessary. We provide everything they need, all of their lives. They look to us when they are hungry or thirsty or sick or lonely. We make their lives as perfect as we can. But there is nothing to be done against age. They look to us again, and we can't turn back the clock. I know I have always done the best by my dogs at the end, but it takes a long time to get over the guilt over being helpless to help them except by setting them free.
ReplyDeleteSherry, I agree with Shay. Pup loved you
ReplyDeleteunconditionally, and you putting him out of his pain was the correct thing to do.
I firmly believe he is with you in spirit.
Pamela
The shadow will always be there within your shadow, Sherry. It fits within the shape of yours, so you don't see the outline of pointy ears and tail.
ReplyDeletea very different take to the shadow - very nice! the shadow will never leave - a shadow on the heart! a good poem!!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful writing. (((hug))) x
ReplyDeleteI can so relate - I walk by my old canine shadow's grave everyday.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing.
Oh Sherry, I hear you in this one. Keep writing about Pup, such a special being. You will not regret it, and in some years you will be glad you have preserved all your memories and feelings. I've 'been there' and treasure the poems I wrote then. And treasure the memories preserved!
ReplyDeleteSherry I can feel your love of this dog and his of you and the grief at losing him. I am a dog person and those endings are just so very difficult. Nice memory poem.
ReplyDeleteA beautiful poem that triggers so much in me and brought tears instantly, moments have a way of forcing themselves into your mind, don't let that memory push it's way in front of all the wonderful memories you have of your pup, he loved you and would hate you to be unhappy. Hugs x
ReplyDeleteYes, he was your shadow, and still is. Keep remembering Sherry, that is healing,
ReplyDeleteElizabeth
You did what you felt good for him and he might know that as well.So dont feel bad..
ReplyDeleteSure he will hate you to be unhappy..
Sherry,
ReplyDeleteI think I have seen your boy Pup, within your words.
His shadow will always be present.
Thinking of the poignancy behind your shadow poem.
Best Regards,
Eileen
You left Pup with dignity, his wolf like self, could not have endured the pain and agony of not being able to go, do.
ReplyDeleteI love what Eileen wrote about seeing Pup in your words. He is always with you in spirit, he wants you to take his shadow self back into nature. You must go on the walks, he would of dreamed of. You owe it to his soul and yours, to partake in the wilderness of your heart! xXx
Of course Pup's shadow has simply blended with yours now, as Kerry says. His steps will continue to follow yours until the end of time...love like that never dies. xxxx
ReplyDeleteDogs we love have a way of following us for as long as we live - whether here or in spirit...we are blessed to have them...bkm
ReplyDeleteIt's kinda sad. Maybe he'll return as a shadow in the form of another wolf. But even now he's a shadow. It must have felt just like yesterday when he died an unfortunate death. but his spirit lingers around even today, like a shadow.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful poem.