Saturday, December 20, 2014

The Night Before Christmas At My House

The stockings aren’t hung.
It should be no surprise.
In today’s economy,
Santa has to downsize.

The Walmart shoppers 
have slowed to a trickle.
If you’re not done by now,
you’re in a real pickle.

Jeff slams in and out
to the front porch to smoke. 
Jon groans:
“Trying to sleep 
in this house is a joke”

In the living room Steph and Gord,
tucked in their bed,
watch dreams of a night’s sleep
die in their head. 

Jeff’s back! reaching for 
the doorknob with glee.
Five dogs raise their heads:
“Oh, it’s time to go pee!”

Walking dogs in the dark,
I fall in the ditch.
This Christmas gig 
can be a real b-tch!

Mother Hubbard arrives
to prepare the big feast.
How’ll she ever turn 
lentils and beans
to Roast Beast?

Old Dog thinks he’s died
and gone straight to Dog Hell,
and his owner suspects
she has gone there as well.

Sixteen humans 
are coming for dinner
and bringing eight dogs.
Someone’s a real winner!

I’m the old woman 
who lives in a shoe.
We’ll have to hang ‘em on pegs
or else go somewhere new.

Two hundred inches 
of rain falling down:
Here’s hoping Santa 
and his reindeer don’t drown.

I can make it till Christmas 
is over, I think,
especially if you pour me 
one more little drink ;)

This was written during Christmas of 2010, my poor old Pupster's last Christmas, when all the kids came home - the last time we were all together in one place, at the same time. I lived in my tiny trailer then, and people were crammed in like sardines. But it was wonderful, full of cackles and hilarity - and an abundance of dogs, just the way we like it!

Reposted for the last Poetry Pantry of December 2014 at Poets United. Happy Holidays, kids. Have a wonderful one, and I'll see you in the new year!!!!


  1. Sherry, I really enjoyed your Christmas reminiscing. It is good to remember those times when family gets together. What may seem difficult at one time sometimes turns into the best time ever. I do hope you enjoy your Christmas this year and in retrospect that it will be another best time ever.

  2. Yes, it was, in retrospect, the best time ever. Sigh. Thanks, Mary. Hope you have an awesome Christmas too.

  3. Hard to imagine so many people, and dogs, in a trailer, Sherry! Yet this is the stuff good memories are mad of, the craziness, the unusual, and the laughter. Wishing you a happy Christmas!

  4. Delightful, Sherry! Merry Christmas!

  5. What a wonderful memory.. To share a small space can be wonderful, it's not the abundance of food but the company that counts.. Have a merry Christmas Sherry.

  6. full of joy and festive cheer.Merry Christmas.

  7. Haha! This absolutely put a smile on my face - such a tender Christmas story. Despite the chaos, a single drink can change everything - for that, cheers, Sherry! Happy holidays to you and to your loved ones.

  8. With a house full somebody has to captain the ship sorry it is you...again.

  9. Ah Sherry there is such a delightful mixture of smiles and poignancy here - just perfect... Bravo!

  10. These are the memories that make that smile just appear, wonderful Christmas poem.

  11. In retrospect, this must bring a sigh of joy! may you have equally joyous, if less populated, holidays this year, friend.

  12. Oh I loved your version of the Night Before Christmas, Sherry. It reminds me of the small house and all 8 of us there when we were bathroom, 3 bedrooms and one tiny kitchen....such love!

  13. The best times are found in those small places of life. Wishing you a joyous holiday season my friend. You are light to many.

  14. gracias for sharing a piece of your loving history.

    i read your words with much pleasure and wish you and yours nothing less than joy and contentment.

    gracias mi amiga
    feliz dias de celebraciones

  15. Very funny. Gave me a good chuckle.

  16. Oh, I love this, Sherry. "All the dogs and people, living life as one..."
    And I'm glad I'm not the only one who says "roast beast" that an old home town expression we share?
    Thinking of you with love and hugs, K

  17. Super charming, Sherry! I think even stressful things can be fun if approached in the right spirit. It is not always the Christmas spirit--but great if it can be! Take care. k.

  18. What a delight to read your words today, Sherry!! Isn't it the best when everyone's together and packed in?! Those tend to be the times we never forget! You've put a smile on my face and warmth in my heart. Merry Christmas to you :)

  19. Good grief girl! Nice write!
    I can relate

  20. I really like how you incorporated that Old Mother Hubbard tale and the Woman That Lived in a Shoe as metaphors. I also thought this line to be particularly funny:
    Jeff’s back! reaching for
    the doorknob with glee.
    Five dogs raise their heads:
    “Oh, it’s time to go pee!”

    I had a good laugh inside reading that.

    Really great poem Sherry! :)

  21. Loved this funny and agitated poem! Funny and not, when you're saying ' I’m the old woman
    who lives in a shoe.'... But it's important for family to get together. ~ happy holidays, Sherry! I'm grateful for our poetic friendship! xx

  22. Hi, Sherry, i just love to read the rhyming and the story behind the poem

  23. Oh yes, one more drink would be great. I can relate to the rest of it also.

  24. When loved ones and wonderful folks come a-calling no place is enough, the smaller the more fun. Thanks for sharing Sherry and great lines!


  25. Sounds like a lot of fun and merriment Sherry ~ Wishing you Merry and Blessed Christmas this time around ~ All the best ~

  26. Sherry,

    Loved the love and the joy within your whole Christmas experience, captured and told in this great poetic form. Loved knowing you had a happy time and an abundance of dogs around you then!! Dear Pup, recalled with love, as much as ever:)
    Hope you have a calmer experience this year Sherry, with a touch of love, rest and merriment.
    Best Christmas wishes,

  27. Interesting..Happy Holidays and a very Happy New Year

  28. Oh, Sherry! I love your poem and how you interjected the magic of humor and love!! You are so talented and fun~ I can feel the love in this poem~ Merry Christmas to you and yours~

  29. haha...hopefully you have a little less hell and a bit more joy this time of year sherry...even if you need to let the dogs out often...ha....this is def a bit mor the chaotic christmas than the ideal we are sold..but christmas all the same....

    have a wonder-filled holiday sherry...


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