Saturday, May 4, 2019

MY CURRENT PHOBIA





They say, “It’s easy.” (Not.) They say, "I’ll walk you through it”, but my eyes glaze over. They say “Anyone can do it.” Not me. Behind the screen, in the bowels of technology, where Mr Linky lives, is Dangerville, for me. It does not compute. I am a person dragged kicking and screaming into the land of technology. I used an Underwood manual typewriter for 30 years until my boss insisted I learn computers. I bless him, now.

But, still, there are limits. Every week, I hunt someone down to insert the linky at the Pantry. They may be abroad, or in the midst of crisis, but Mr Linky must go in, every weekend. Staff members who know how to Linky may never quit. My Fear of Mr Linky creates difficulties for my teammates. Mea culpa. But, thanks for putting up with me.

I am phobic about all things technical. I live in mortal fear of accidentally clicking the wrong thing, and the Blue Screen of Death appearing.  I have seen it a time or two. I have PTSD from a traumatic experience with Tech Help, exacerbated by the intervention of a very angry brother-in-law.

They say “Face Your Fear.” They say, “Find the thing you fear the most and Do That.” But – umm –  I am averse to engaging in activities that will increase my stress to Fight or Flight levels. I hope to reach that Final Screen, if my teammates will be so kind, without ever having to venture into the Land of Mr Linky.

258 words for Magaly’s prose prompt at Telling Tales With Magaly, at Poets United this Sunday: Phobias


23 comments:

  1. Ha ha!! I know it doesn't help to say it is not that difficult. If something is scary, it is scary. No two ways about it. Good thing there are enough of us around with linky skills. smiles.

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  2. I am so thankful that when I got together with Andrew he had one of the first PCs in Australia and didn't mind me fiddling around on it – and that then, when we changed to Mac, we found a technician who didn't just fix a machine and hand it back, but sat his clients down at their computers and guided them through the operations. I didn't have to be scared, as he would tell me: 'Click that.' And afterwards I knew what to do. Also he taught me the great value of the Help menu (when in doubt....) and the 'Undo' button! Otherwise I would be just as scared as you. I was, before that. Anyway, congratulations on doing so much online so well, despite the fears!

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  3. You crack me up! I could take you there in a second or two--but instead, I'll just volunteer when I am around.

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  4. When i was being trained in a hospital admitting job, first time EVER on a computer, i took notes, beginning with Turn On. They looked at me like i was daft. I would say "it's telling me to...." and they would say "it's a MACHINE." But i knew it was in charge, lol.

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  5. I am laughing so hard that I'm shaking. Sherry, this is sooo good. I hope one day you decide to read this aloud, with hand gestures and eye-widening and everything.

    The tone and rhythm of the story are perfect. And beyond the laughter, I completely agree with the serious messaged weaved into the chuckles--if something stresses me out, and I can push it away, pushed away will be.

    This was yummy!

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  6. This is so funny, but i can relate to it. i worked in telecommunications and so there was no way of escaping the change. :)

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  7. Don't feel alone Sherry, I am with you. Thank god I have no work with linky. Shudder.

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  8. I never used to worry about technology, it was my job for a while, but things have developed at such a rate I can’t help but panic when the Internet drops out or I lose a file. However, I think I’ve made friends with Mr Linky! I’m sorry, Sherry, but I smiled when I read that you ‘have PTSD from a traumatic experience with Tech Help’ – I’ve been there too with WordPress!

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  9. My goodness you almost had me there for a moment, Sherry! This is really good! In the fast changing era we live in there is no escaping technology!❤️

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  10. Aw! LOL, I feel a little bad laughing, but you did such a good job inserting a gentle humor into this piece. I need to share this with my mom-in-law, who keeps trying to master the technology beast. Fortunately for her, my husband is an IT guy, and she gets personalized help all the time.

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  11. Amazing how our brains keep us locked in a state of anxiety even after we do something repeatedly...tech is a constantly changing environment and changing environments are like traveling a road we do not know where is is going...bkm

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  12. It is especially annoying when we learn what we need to learn and then Blogger, or Google, or facebook changes the rules. Gah! Lol.

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  13. Sherry- this is utterly delightful! I love it, and thank heavens you have understanding people around you.

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  14. Ha.. isn't it amazing how something like poetry today means that you have to learn the technical stuff... reminds me of all the things that I've learned on my journey so far...

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  15. You said it!!! And you said it well! I am also a techno-peasant...and am often in the dark.

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  16. I consider myself barely above the technonincompoop level. Yet others assume that because I spend so much time and do so many things on my computer, that I am some sort of expert. I'm not and just like you, if something is changed, I panic. I love your story Sherry, it made me both smile and nod my head in commiseration.

    Elizabeth

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  17. Lovely! Technology is something that people who are proficient tend to find it "normal" & forget that there are things they don't know or had to learn or that not everyone wants to relearn the same task over and over (a personal pet peeve). I share your fear of Mr. Linky. :)

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  18. Sherry, your story is precious. Especially because I relate so well to it. I was phobic about computers for years after my boss put one on my desk, paid for my training and ordered me to use it. I never did. Yesterday, I'm ashamed to admit, I spent too much time trying to find a file in Word. I'm very clumsy, ignorant and mostly inept at computer stuff. That's why I don't really do Face Book.
    Reading your story makes me feel slightly less embarrassed at my computer incompetence.
    Loved reading this.

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  19. Oh, Sherry! You made me laugh so hard. You who are so diligent with posting around the blogs, are afraid of Mr Linky? You could have me fooled! Thank you for the laughs.

    p.s. Love your new gravatar pic, by the way!

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  20. I can truly relate Sherry! It is easy for others to say it is easy, just do it or face your fear, but when it is your fear, it is not that easy. One of my daughters used to tell me "you just have to feel your way around" and that is very true but where fear is born things can get complicated.

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  21. How I agree, what I need is an young office assistant who knows it all to sort out all these technical things that make my head spin, I am writer that's all...finito!

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  22. Oh, I understand. My husband plopped a computer in front of me, and said, "You're on your own." His job had him working two keyboards and 12 computer screens. No, to anything computer when he came home. I jumped in, learned most of it on my own. I'm no expert, but I manage. Driving is my terror.

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  23. I feel your pain, Sherry! I'm nearly at that point myself- of asking everyone for help in deciphering all things techy!

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