No matter how many glasses
she drank,
she never found
the happiness she sought
at the bottom of each one.
A thirst that
could not be quenched,
a need unfulfilled,
stalked her days.
"I had it all,"
she said on her deathbed.
I was glad she thought so,
but to me, her life
seemed hard and painful.
As a child, I feared
the glasses of liquid
they loved so much.
I feared the party atmosphere
with which each weekend
started out,
lay trembling during
the blows and crashes
and screams
towards midnight.
Next morning, I hated the smell
of stale booze and cigarettes,
and the way we sat silently
around the table
pretending the night before
had never happened.
for The Sunday Muse
This hits home and hits hard my friend. That next day silence cuts to the quick. Such hard and sad memories yet you have lived a more beautiful life Sherry. You always inspire me!
ReplyDeleteThat is so powerful, Sherry. It is gut-wrenching and honest. Indeed must have been hard to keep pretending that these painful times never happened. And...ouch, to think that she thought she 'had it all.'
ReplyDeleteThis one is so real :'(
ReplyDeleteHeartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteNo one does candor better than you!
ReplyDeleteVery sad...but without the struggle and
ReplyDeleteterrible times you would not be the writer that you are...a very good one I am surprised that no one has snapped you up as an interviewer..a salaried position would be nice...you were excellent at that too.
Cressida, thank you.......I did love interviewing people.........it has always been my favourite thing. Peoples' stories fascinate me and are more interesting than any fiction. I am now old and tired though and content enough to be doing much less. Smiles.
ReplyDelete""I had it all,"
ReplyDeleteshe said on her deathbed.
I was glad she thought so,
but to me, her life
seemed hard and painful." - children experience things so directly and with such consequence.
This is painful truth written so vividly. One of your most powerful poems.
ReplyDeletePowerful portrait of an unsatisfied, painful life.
ReplyDeleteHaving to face the pain and grief about what has happened is never easy. You voiced it well.
ReplyDelete