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Saturday, November 24, 2018

Life, Like a Loping Camel



The days sift by dreamily,
but the weeks snap past like a zipline,
me upside-down and pulled along
too swiftly
into my old age.

My steps are slow and hobbling,
yet somehow
it is always Another Friday,
and another week
has passed.

Not like a field mouse,
hidden in the grass,
but rather a loping camel,
life gallops on:

too fast, too fast, too fast.


For Kim's prompt at Real Toads: And the days are not full enough.

My original last line was: "whipping my sorry ass", which I changed in the interests of poetic sensibilities. LOL. The field mouse is from Ezra Pound's poem, quoted in the prompt.

18 comments:

  1. Oh I so agree that ‘weeks snap past like a zipline’ and so have the last couple of days! I also feel like I’m being pulled towards old age while I’m slowing down. That’s a great image you’ve conjured of life as a camel (whipping your sorry…) Sherry!

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  2. IMO, it's MUCH better as "too fast." The other way it would be merely goofy; this way it's, as you say, poetic.

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    1. There is lots of goofy in my world. LOL. Sometimes it slips out.

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  3. Indeed, too fast and just as lumpy. And every now and again, it spits in your eye.

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  4. Too fast... yet sometimes it seems to me like days are stumbling more than floating... definitely not a field mouse for me either.

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  5. Too fast and sometimes it feels like life is slipping by ... a most poignant and beautiful poem, Sherry!❤️

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  6. Isn't that so?! Days have such a dreamy quality to them but the weeks and the months seem to be passing by so swiftly. A lovely poem, Sherry, which made me smile. And I love, love your original last line, poetic sensibility or not. Ha! :-)

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  7. Sherry, the thought of you on a zipline has me giggling, but what you say is so very true!

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  8. I like your revised last line better, actually – and not because of prudishness; it just gallops along so nicely, in keeping with what you say. And I love the loping camel.

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  9. It's amazing to me how quickly time is passing, especially the older I get. Beautifully written Sherry.

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  10. slow days, but fast weeks. I get that. Time is very funny that way.

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  11. I relate to this poem so much, with the days drifting by slowly, but the weeks whipping by faster than I can blink.

    I like both endings, but I agree with you; the one you chose was more poetic.

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  12. Wonderful, Sherry. I should adopt your poem. (I'm older than you.)
    ..

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  13. Perfect and funny. Love life's zip line image.

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  14. whipping my sorry arse is better:)You're right...It's always Friday...if you find out why time is speeding on faster than normal,could you please let me know:)

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