Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Tankas



Grace, over at Real Toads, has given one of her inimitable challenges, (and that is definitely the right word for it), to compose a series of no less than three tankas, which are five lines with syllable counts of 5-7-5-7-7, with a turning point between the upper phrase and lower phrase. 


I was quite pleased to have managed one, but decided to try for three and see what happens.


When cares weigh down my
shoulders like an albatross
till I nearly fall,
I raise my old eyes, seeking,
to the glory of the skies.


  ***   ***   ***   ***


Horses drink deeply
at the trough of fulfilment
then turn to their oats
with pleasure - never let them
see the carrots in your hand.


   ***   ***   ***   ***


Snow falling outside
covers the cedars with lace.
All thoughts of spring are
put back on the shelf until
the groundhog appears again.


   ***   ***   ***   ***


By George, I think I've Got It!!!

24 comments:

  1. Wonderful Sherry! I love these; they outline the features and fill in with sentiment! Yours are beautiful~

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  2. "Until the groundhog appears again" — I love it!
    By George, I think you really did got it. LOL
    K

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  3. cuz oats are only a pleasure until they see those carrots...mmmmmm...mmmmmm. All three are spectacular, vivid and beautiful beyond the number of lines and syllables allowed.

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  4. No idea who George is, but I'm quite sure you've still got it! Three very different, and very good tankas Sherry!

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  5. Sherry, I think the Tanka and you make good partners. These are evocative and interesting, in addition to following the strict form. Amazing!

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  6. Awww lovely, well done.
    I don't think the horses would need to see the carrots Sherry... they'd smell 'em a mile away LOL

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  7. Lovely tankas. This was a fun exercise.
    The last one is so beautiful, but I think the first is my favorite.

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  8. Look at you writing 3 tanka (I am still struggling with mine). I do like them all specially the second one ~

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  9. Sherry, you have nailed the Tanka form. I like each of them...bravo to you.

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  10. Sherry, you have nailed the Tanka form. I like each of them...bravo to you.

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  11. yes, i can hear you objecting, but oh sherry, you are good at this. keep on, please.

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  12. Sherry, these are so wonderful, each in their own right! OH and I got tagged in blogger-tag. I'm tagging you if you want to play. NO PRESSURE:) The details are here:
    http://anotherporch.blogspot.com/2012/03/blogger-tag.html

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  13. Love these...love all of these, but the first one really speaks to me..

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  14. I love all of these, particularly the first wherein the weighty albatross reminds one to look to the skies.

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  15. Really lovely, Sherry. The second one made me chuckle.

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  16. I can picture the lace-covered cedars and the horses drinking at the trough of fulfilment - stunning images, Sherry!

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  17. Love your images, and I see you know my horses! :-) Wonderfully done my dear!

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  18. Lovely! I truly enjoyed the horse advice. Sounds a lot like goats. :-)

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  19. Your third is especially striking, with the lace and waiting for the ground again. Lovely all!

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  20. i love number one.
    the weight of the albatros turns to flight and lift in the end.
    such power.

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  21. An albatross on the shoulders is a wonderfully descriptive image - and I love how you end it on a note of hope.

    The second - ha, yes, this is actually true (but I usually hide an apple :)

    The lace image in the third and putting spring being put on a shelf is wonderful.

    I really liked these.

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  22. These are totally lovely. Bravo - Tanka is good for you.

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  23. I love these, especially that second one! It reminds me of those Zen koans!

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I so appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
Thank you so much. I will be over to see you soon!